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Thursday, October 22, 2015

Thoughts on weaning my 3-year-old

Dax had his last drop of breast milk the day he turned 3 years old.

He has slowly been limiting his nursing sessions and I was just done. We were down to nursing before nap and bed and maybe in the middle of the night here and there.

I always said 2 years old was my nursing limit. I didn't think I could handle nursing any longer. Dax's second birthday came and went and we didn't even discuss weaning him. He was too dependent on the milk. I felt bad because he was facing all these food allergies and sensitivities. I wanted to make sure he was getting the right nourishment and comfort her needed.

I gave him a countdown and warned him he would be done with milk after he turned 3. He would repeat it back and we would talk about it.

I know people have mixed emotions about nursing all together. Some say 3 is too old to nurse anyway. Some say nurse longer, to 5 maybe.

I just did what felt right to our family. It seemed to fit to let him nurse until he was 3.

My husband and I prepared for some rough nights. I figured nap was out the window.

I have been a bit surprised. 

The first day we didn't nurse for nap was the day after he turned 3. We had the house to ourselves. He cried for a little bit to nurse but I reminded him we can't nurse anymore. He loves to touch my skin as he sleeps so I offered him cuddles and skin to skin. He tossed and turned a bit more than usual (although not much, kid never stays still for more than a minute). Then he drifted off into a sweet nap.

Bedtime was similar. I almost caved at nap time and bed time that day but felt this was right for us.

He slept so soundly that first night without milk, well after he toddled his way back to my bed shortly after falling asleep and felt my skin to sooth himself back to sleep. One step at a time, I guess. He can sleep in my bed for a bit longer if it makes him feel safer.

I feel sad that I never snapped a last nursing pic. He sure loved to nurse and talk about his nursing.

He still has a few food allergies/intolerances, though we have successfully introduced a few foods back into his diet with no problem. We now face a new normal. I have to figure out how to get him to sleep without nursing on my work nights. I have to figure out when I feel safe enough to introduce the foods back into my system since I don't have to avoid anything due to nursing him. I have to figure out how to teach him that I may be able to eat something that isn't safe for him after he and I sharing the same diet for so long.

I'm ready. I think he is ready. He didn't even ask to nurse today, third day of weaning. He just snuggled me. He did skip his nap but he sometimes skipped it even with the milkies. :)

I feel like he is sleeping more soundly (as long as he is near me) than when he nursed. It is hard letting go with him being my last baby, of course. 

2 comments:

  1. That is how I weaned my first baby, except she was four. I did the exact same thing, about two months before her birthday I said when she turned four there would be no more boobie milk. I hugged her and kissed her and cuddled her lots and still laid down with her before bed. Of course she was an only child, but it was still a big change for both of us.

    Weaning is a big deal for the nursling but even bigger for the mom I think. I have always felt that for mom, nursing is so sweet, all the changes that happen in the early years of a baby's life, the one thing that stays the same for mom as she watches her child grow and grow, is that little face in your arms nursing. For me it was always a bit hard when it ended. I won't go on and on here, though I think I will talk about it on my blog now :)

    I love being a part of your life, if from afar! I wish we lived near one another as I think our girls and our darling little boys would be such great friends!

    And congratulations on three years! Three years with food allergies and a restricted diet is HARD and I don't think any mom can guess how hard if she has not done it! I also have to wonder, with all the benefits for a mom who breastfeeds and the benefits for a girl who was breastfed (all the reduced cancers) I wonder what kind of amazing benefits a little boy receives who is lucky enough to nurse "full term".

    Anyway, glad to be part of your journey!

    Apryl

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    1. You are sweet, Apryl. I bet we would have a blast as neighbors.

      I did this same approach with Chaz when I weaned him at 2. I feel blessed to have nursed little Dax for 3 years. Two years was my limit and he showed me we could go longer. :)

      I love nursing my babies. It is so sweet to be their main source of nourishment, see that tiny face, be so dependent upon. Being a mom sure is a blessing.

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